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| Name | Time | Sex | Beer | Notes | |
| 1. | Chin Ball Wizard "CBW" | 10:25.0 | M | Bud Light, from can | |
| 2. | Waddling Wanker "WW" | 10:52.0 | M | Sam Adams Cherry Wheat, from bottle | First Beermile |
| 3. | Cock-a-dile "CDM" | 10:55.0 | F | Tecate / Heineken, from can | First Beermile |
| 4. | Oedipussy "O" | 10:56.0 | M | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | First Beermile, attended Uni High |
| 5. | Bent Penis "BP" | 11:34.0 | M | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | |
| 6. | ZZ Top Notch "ZZ" | 11:55.0 | M | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | First Beermile |
| 7. | Cell Your Ass "CYA" | 12:25.0 | F | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | First Beermile |
| 8. | Numb Nuts "NN" | 12:25.0 | M | Steinlager, from bottle | w/ Penatly Lap, under review |
| 9. | Buster Hymen "BH" | 12:32.0 | M | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | |
| 10. | Sarah Legal "SL" | 12:52.0 | M | Heineken, from bottle | First Beermile |
| 11. | FMITA Nancy Queer "Nancy" | 13:30.0 | M | Bud Light, from can | First Beermile |
| 12. | Cums in the Backdoor "CitBD" | 16:52.0 | M | Miller Chill, from bottle | First Beermile |
| 13. | Strokin in the Boyz Room "SitBR" | 17:24.0 | M | Mickey's, from bottle | w/ Penalty Lap, self imposed |
| 14. | Horse's Ass "HA" | 17:56.0 | M | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | |
| 15. | Cream Puff "CP" | 18:33.0 | M | Budweiser, from can | |
| 16. | Blow My Mind "BMM" | 18:48.0 | F | Pabst Blue Ribbon, from can | |
| 17. | Smokey and the Handjob "SatHJ" | 21:43.0 | M | New Castle, from bottle | First Beermile |
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