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| Name | Time | Sex | Age | Beer | Notes | |
| 1. | Ricky "Ricky Bobby" Hutchinson | 6:23.0 | M | 45 | Miller, from can | Run like the cops are chasing |
| 2. | Seth "Samurai" Ozasa | 7:23.0 | M | 35 | Miller, from can | Beijing BM in 2012 |
| 3. | Mike "Grandpa" McHalffet | 8:0.0 | M | 51 | Miller, from can | Hammer em early |
| 4. | Peet "Petey" Booysen | 8:22.0 | M | 45 | Miller, from can | DQ - amateurs only race |
| 5. | Joe "Big Joe" Haynes | 8:31.0 | M | 46 | miller, from can | Duck feet's big day |
| 6. | Calvin "Calbo" Sears | 8:51.0 | M | 55 | Miller, from can | 4 beers too many |
| 7. | Nick "Cuckoo 2" Tullos | 8:59.0 | M | 30 | miller, from can | Rookie attempt |
| 8. | Joseph "Lil Joey" Fell | 9:10.0 | M | 25 | Miller, from can | pounds his big bro |
| 9. | Jeremy Brown | 9:11.0 | M | 35 | miller, from can | rookie attempt |
| 10. | Eric "sensai" Sullivan | 9:13.0 | M | 40 | miller, from can | mad dash for the win |
| 11. | Greg "hound dog" Bell | 9:38.0 | M | 50 | miller, from can | retired and no life |
| 12. | Derrick "viking" Ellis | 9:57.0 | M | 30 | miller, from can | the cape made me do it |
| 13. | Scott "latte" Harville | 10:26.0 | M | 55 | Budweiser, from can | smooooth |
| 14. | Chad "tough mudder" Warren | 10:28.0 | M | 35 | miller, from can | rookie attempt |
| 15. | Daniel "Poke" Anderson | 10:36.0 | M | 45 | Budweiser, from can | Just Poke |
| 16. | Glenn "shaggy" Feazel | 10:46.0 | M | 35 | miller, from can | rookie attempt |
| 17. | Brian "sweater boy" Heck | 11:12.0 | M | 45 | miller, from can | gotta run too |
| 18. | Jason "JA" Aleman | 11:16.0 | M | 45 | coors, from can | running sucks |
| 19. | Jason "Wino" Weinland | 11:42.0 | M | 47 | Budweiser, from can | spew, bad day on the track |
| 20. | Gerritt "Fiver" Moller | 11:58.0 | M | 25 | miller, from can | spew, but no DNF! |
| 21. | Tina "Tank" Ellis | 13:50.0 | F | 30 | miller, from can | spew, but WIN |
| 22. | Tiffany Seaton | 18:30.0 | F | 25 | Miller, from can | no one told me it was this hard |
| 23. | Kay DeBerardinis | 21:15.0 | F | 50 | Budweiser, from can | whips hubby |
| 24. | David DeBerardinis | DNF | ran 'the half' |
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