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| Name | Time | Sex | Age | Beer | Notes | |
| 1. | Skip "Spando Man" Gilson | 7:38.0 | M | 19 | Coors Orig, from can | PR second time |
| 2. | Richie "The Ballz" Spitsberg | 7:49.0 | M | 20 | Budweiser, from can | Had a race number |
| 3. | Rachelle "The Female Phenom" Duerre | 8:0.0 | F | 20 | Coors Orig, from can | HOLY FUCK! |
| 4. | Preston "WTF" Dahl | 8:43.0 | M | 19 | Keystone Light, from can | Doesn't actually run |
| 5. | Veronica "The Hott Engineer" Sackett | 8:50.0 | F | 21 | Coor Orig, from can | First timer DAMN |
| 6. | Zach "One Eyed Panther" Cory | 8:56.0 | M | 19 | Budweiser, from can | Freshman Biotch |
| 7. | Margaret "Rotten" Landberg | 9:21.0 | F | 20 | Coors Orig, from can | Prerry Fuckin' Good |
| 8. | Patrick "Rooster" Mahoney | 9:31.0 | M | 21 | Budweiser, from can | FUCK defending CHAMP (Ouch) |
| 9. | Matt "BIG red" Sailer | 9:47.0 | M | 20 | Coors Orig, from can | Roookie to beer mile Puked PL |
| 10. | Dan "The General" McClellan | 10:34.0 | M | 19 | Premium Grain Belt, from can | First timer doesn't actually run |
| 11. | Ben "The Clydesdale" York | 11:29.0 | M | 19 | Budweiser, from can | First timer doesn't actually run |
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