Top Performances Drinking Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale
(not following "official" Kingston rules)
| Name (* official) | Time | Location | Race | Sex | Age | Beer | Notes | |
| 1. | Kevin "Smith" Smith* | 9:01.9 | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Spring K-W BM (Ontario Championships) | M | 24 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | Dated & shitty? |
| 2. | Paulo Monte* | 13:13.8 | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Spring K-W BM (Ontario Championships) | M | 26 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | Warm up for Toronto |
| 3. | Andrew "Andy Mac" MacDonald | 16:34.0 | Waterloo, ON | 4th Annual Spring K-W BM (The Polar KWBMile) | M | 20 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | Penalty Lap |
| 4. | Andrew "Andy Mac" MacDonald* | 18:31.8 | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Spring K-W BM (Ontario Championships) | M | 21 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | Best male puke |
| 5. | Steve Kristensen* | DNF | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Spring K-W BM (Ontario Championships) | M | 21 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | Stopped at beer 2 |
| 6. | Kate Bickle* | DNF | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Spring K-W BM (Ontario Championships) | F | 21 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | DQ - Traded beers/poured out |
| 7. | Maddy Noble* | DNF | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Spring K-W BM (Ontario Championships) | F | 21 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | DQ - Traded beers/poured out |
| 8. | Andrea "Midget #3" Cousineau* | DNF | Waterloo, ON | 5th Annual Fall K-W BM | F | 20 | Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, can | DQ - Spill With Intent, Rookie |
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