5th Annual Fall K-W BM
Waterloo, ON
November 19, 2005

created by user mullet

Conditions: Cold, Clear


Beer Mile

4 Beers, 4 Laps Stop and Drink, Then Run Full Mile 12oz Beers Open When Drunk 5% Alcohol Beer No Tampering Vomit Penalty Max 4oz Spillage


Race Site

Name Time Gender Age Beer Notes
1 Mike Logue 6:07 M 23 From Can Carling Black Label Defending Champ
2 Dave Hutchinson 6:12 M 23 From Can Labatt 50 PB
3 Scott Arnald 6:45 M 23 From Can Labatt Genuine Draft PB
4 Matt Strickland 7:20 M 22 From Can Labatt 50 PB
5 Steve Formaneck 7:45 M 26 From Can Moosehead Rookie
6 Colin Lawrence 8:05 M 20 From Can Carling Black Label
7 Mark Linseman 8:08 M 20 From Can Stroh's Lager
8 Rich Benko 8:37 M 25 From Can Molson Dry Rookie, 5.5% abv
9 Andrea Dupont 10:33 F 25 Chocolate Milk 4 x 500mL Chocolate Milk from Carton, Rookie
10 Laura Sardone 24:37 F 21 From Can Molson Export Rookie, 1:28 penalty lap, female drunken dash winner
11 Surabhi Venkatesh 28:30 F 22 From Can Moosehead Rookie, skier
12 Julie Maruska DNF F 20 From Can Stella Artois DQ - Spill With Intent, Rookie
13 Tiffany Duncan DNF F 22 From Can Moosehead DQ - 3 beers & 1 chocolate milk, Rookie
14 Andrea Cousineau DNF F 20 From Can Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale DQ - Spill With Intent, Rookie
15 Trudy Gardner DNF F 24 From Can Moosehead DQ - Spill With Intent, 1:55 penalty lap
16 Emie Ukwuoma DNF M 21 From Can Labatt Genuine Draft 200m total
17 Colin Rhodes DNF M 25 Chocolate Milk Done after 3.5 laps, Rookie, skier, drunken dash winner (12.7)
18 Charles Curtis DNF M 25 Done after 2 laps, Rookie

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Race Notes:

The 5th annual fall BM of KW was yet another exciting affair. Although the temperature was nipple-like, the day brought good weather otherwise. 18 brave souls took to the track that evening, although not all would survive the grueling journey of four times around the black oval, all the while turning left, with rest enough only to drink a beer each lap.

As the event approached, the usual banter was bantered and death threats were uttered. The eventual winner called his own number and publicly announced his attempt to become only the ninth man in history to break the sacred 6 minute barrier. There was also a serious challenger in the form of HutchEZ, and the battle for the remaining medals looked tighter than ever.

The race got off quickly, as the defending champ was third off the 1st beer and HutchEZ made an early statement taking the lead. The Mullet B. Miler quickly used running to his advantage and reeled in the superior drinker. The Mullet was in sole possession of 1st for the rest of the race, until HutchEZ once again pulled ahead on the 4th and final beer. In exciting fashion, the champ pounded fast, charged after Hutch, and reeled him in within 100 metres. Now the race was only against the clock as the throng of fans cheered the leader toward the meet and facility record - it would be close.

As he broke the proverbial tape and his time was announced as 6:07, the champ decisively commented "FAAACK" while suppressing the urge to heave. 2 seconds off the record and no sub-6. Unfortunately this feat would have to wait until the spring incarnation. What held him back, the running or the beer? The lactic acid or the acid reflux? We'll never know for sure, but maybe his splits will help tell the story:
12.9 / 63.9
25.9 / 68.4
32.7 / 67.6
32.1 / 62.7

In a huge PB coming off a superb season of hill and dale was HutchEZ in 6:12. Another PB and another medal greeted the Snake at the finish line. The first beer proved troublesome for the rum-and-coke drinker, as this put him too far back to utilize his patented snake-venom strike in the later stages of the race. Overall, the sport seems to be advancing nicely, as all but 3 of the 11 finishers ran PB's. Also, impressive debuts were made by the American doctor and the pseudo-European slacker. Finally, some mad props must be given to the first woman to finish, in 10:33. That is because she did the chocolate milk mile - 4 x 500mL without puking (during the race anyways)!